She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Randomize
