But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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