all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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