the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He better not be in your backpack
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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