you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize