I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can't turn off my feet"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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