Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
