Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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