saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
