is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
