The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
