Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i came on her dog
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
