I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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