why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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