dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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