We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
