my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
