It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
