im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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