My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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