i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize