You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
