Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
