I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize