just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
