I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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