Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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