Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
