We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
