mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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