Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
