She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
