I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
