she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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