Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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