Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
