it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
