I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
