just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
