Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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