All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize