oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
