Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize