Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
