turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
