Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
