I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Randomize
