If that was your dad, he is hot
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
