I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize