I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
